not violent but gentle, 1 Timothy 3:3b
There is a direct contrast between these two character qualities. Violence is a direct result of anger and frustration, someone who is out of control.
Kindness and gentleness are hallmarks of a believer. Kind people overlook insults and the unkind comments others make. They know how to calm a potentially hostile situation. It’s certainly a characteristic lay people should be aspiring to be as well. Kindness and gentleness is not at all a weak quality, but a strong one to possess. It’s easy to “blow up” at the smallest of offenses, but much more difficult to restrain yourself.